Sorry this is late! Ack! Completely forgot...

Oh dear. I hate to be the first to post with what i have to say....but here it goes.

I had a really hard time with section 2. The story Louisa told about killing Eric in self defense was not believable to me. First, the author set it up to make me think that Michael and Louisa were childhood sweethearts so to find out that Louisa was with other men before him kind of left me flat. Second, I grew up in a small town and it is impossible to believe that with all that blood and clearly evidence of a struggle that the police would just believe it was a suicide. And she shot him in the eye, what kind of suicide shots himself in the eye? Third, that scene the author created with Michael and Louisa driving out of town fierce and ready to make their way in the world was believable and the whole eric story just contradicted it so much. I was lead to believe Louisa was a free spirit who wanted to be out in the big bad world and not trapped in a tiny town. Now I think she's just homeless and on the run for the rest of her life. Fourth, there is no explanation of how Michael felt about this, obviously he wanted to protect her and he thought she acted in self defense but to be so understanding that this one night would allow her to walk away from him and her daughter to me is not believable.

So my struggle is that this one chapter makes all the pieces and scenes described earlier unclear and as a reader I've kind of lost the flow.

Awwww Johnny's love letter to Emily was so sweet. I really like this guy.

The scene where Emily goes to meet her grandparents was very believable and endearing. I really liked how the author was able to describe the nervousness and strangeness about this whole event for Emily. How the clothes felt uncomfortable and how their house was so intimidating. But then she changed in to her own clothes and played in the back yard and everything eased.

LOL she fought her fuck-and-run instincts and moved in with Johnny, how delightfully worded.

Again the author says that Emily doesn't want to get close to anyone because she's seen how it hurt her father and her grandparents. But this doesn't make sense to me. She sees her father happy, strong, a good job, friends, family and he shows her love in a kind way. I don't understand why she wouldn't trust a man. He's shown her in every way that a man can be a provider and a protector. Something is disconnected here for me personally.

I was shocked when Emily and her dad talked and he said he thought she might come back. This seemed out of character to me but I think it's just because these characters idk aren't complete. Like there are pieces missing and perhaps the author is trying to fill in those blanks as she's unfolding the story, it makes it very difficult to connect with the characters.

I DO understand when Emily confessed that she didn't want to love anyone because "love leaves" THAT makes sense. And it thought it was brilliant when her dad said "Emily, no one will ever break your heart like she did, I can promise you that."

Ugh, problems with Regan and drugs/alcohol, not good. I was surprised that Johnny suggested Emily boot her from the band. That's not really what someone would say. Especially if he loved her, he would say "let's get her some help" or something like that. I didn't like that whole argument they had and I don't think his apology was sincere, he was just trying to end the fight.

*rolls eyes* oh it's too much. A botched abortion! Really? How unnecessary. I really feel like if the author would just spend more time developing the characters instead of throwing these shocking events at us the book would be better.

And then they had such a nice girlfriend conversation and Regan had to go and mention Louisa being raped by Eric?? Hello left turn again. For me it would have worked better if Emily had been the one to overhear that years ago, I mean the author is going back and forth in time somewhat why not have Emily find that out and have it shape what's she's discovering about her mother.

I don't even know what to say about the fight that Johnny and Emily had when she returned to the apartment. He threatened to kill her, really? Really? He hasn't shown this in his character before and now all of a sudden he's physically abusive and threatening to kill her? Aside from the fact that I was enjoying Emily discovering what love is as the two of them were going along nicely in their relationship, this plot twist lost me completely. I liked Johnny and I think the author intended me to like him so why? Why take this turn? I get that she's paralleling what happened to her mom, like maybe because this happened with Johnny Emily will be able to understand and forgive her mother for killing eric. But I'm sorry it really really doesn't work for me.

I liked Louisa's letter to Emily but mostly because it just answered a lot of questions and told me a lot about Louisa. But Emily disappearing is extremely disappointing to me. She left her dad just like Louisa did and how horrible that she do that to him after she watched him suffer so much. Shame on her. And the drugs. Ugh coke, sleeping pills, alcohol. Giving up her music. Moving around. And then after a really bad trip and strange dream about her mom she sees the light and decides she's going to get her band back together and straighten up. Sorry, hard to believe.

So I haven't read part 3 yet. I wanted to wait until we put up posts about part 2 first because knowing what’s going to happen I think will influence the conversation. I'm curious to see where the author takes the story, however, I have a sinking feeling I'm not going to like or believe it. I can tell you at the very least I think there was a better way of going about getting Emily to the place of forgiveness and adulthood. A place where she's going to live a normal happy, balanced life. Of course if she ends up killing herself at the end of the book then I'd have to say fucking brilliant!! Cause that's the only logical ending I can see myself believing.

wow, part 2...intense. now i feel like a total fool for thinking that johnny would be so good. shame because the whole love note was such a good, happy part. i liked the way they were flirting by fighting and everything and she finally started to settle down. but as soon as he suggested getting a new drummer i knew that things were going to go south. i didn't think it would be in such a big way though but the whole fight with him made sense to me with his ambition. i'm really glad that she didn't just give up on regan and i loved her whole distinction on how she wanted to be a musician where he wanted to be a rockstar. i can't believe she gave up the music though. the whole last part was pretty depressing. following in her mother's footsteps. although i guess she couldn't have just returned to carlisle defeated.

denise: i never thought of the murder like that and you have a point but then i was thinking of how they covered up the murder in Speak Softly and it was kind of the same. they could have easily found out if they wanted to but no one really cared to investigate. or at least that's the way i saw it. there are some holes about her leaving the father and everything though.

true, her father set a good example about men but i think all of the other guys that she had sex with didn't do anything to help. it feels like she's afraid to let anyone in, even regan. like when she said that they never really talked things out-they were more 'action-oriented.' that's why the hospital scene where she told about louisa and eric makes sense to me. it was supposed to be like a sharing thing. regan would talk about her issues (or maybe try to shift the focus a little bit) and emily was supposed to talk about hers but she didn't handle it very well. i think the whole botched abortion out of the blue was just to show how out of touch they were that she didn't even see it coming.

the going back to her music thing after the bad trip is a little hard to believe (although the hallucinations were pretty interesting). i think it has something to do with her being miserable at her lowest point and the whole policy about not wanting to be a rock cliche, which i really respect in her character.

quotes that i liked...
"But when I gazed out at this new audience (from a much smaller and lower stage than I was used to), I remembered that this was a crowd who had a bunch of other options. There were plenty of other shows, parties, and clubs they could go to, but they chose to see us..."

"It had been like the punk-rock version of the board game Life. Spin the wheel, move along toward that goal of happily ever after, the million-dollar record contract, or whatever the hell I was supposed to be working for."

I agree I liked the distinction between being a musician and a rockstar. But didn't she say in the beginning she wanted to be a rockstar?

Back to Eric's death. The author spent a lot of time saying how the town whispered about Louisa when she drove out of town and kicked her shoe through the window. Seems like someone's suicide, especially since they did say they thought he killed himself because Louisa broke up with him. so why wouldn't everyone be whispering about that?? I just don’t get why it wouldn't have been buzzed about at all considering the author made such a strong point to say that Emily heard whispers about her mother all the time.

I guess I can see the botched abortion as a way of demonstrating how out of touch Emily had become with Regan. But that could have been accomplished by having her od on pills and booze too. I thought the author was more trying to show that regan DID follow in her mother's footsteps and got pregnant as a teen. But regan didn't want to repeat history so she tried to abort. Because regan had mentioned it earlier, not wanting to repeat her mother's mistake.

Now I'm gonna start section 3 and I really hope it's good.

Denise: Sorry you didn't like the story about Louisa. I think the scene with them leaving is still believable in the sense that Louise faked it for quite awhile before she had Emily and couldn't stand it anymore. I mean, I think her leaving is part fake in a way and part simply hoping that she can finally be free of the guilt and the town and live a new life with Michael....

I liked when Emily saw her grandparents as well. It was definitely described well. Don't you just hate when you have to go somewhere and you're stuck wearing something you hate? Or just any kind of scenario such as that? Makes things a lot more awkward...

I don't think it's necessarily that Emily feels she can't trust a guy, but maybe just getting close to someone in general and having to worry about them walking away...like her mom. I think it's just a fear of getting too close and I guess I can understand that.

I don't have a problem with the shocking events in the book because these things happen and some people do go through a lot in their life. I feel like it's harder for people to believe things and accept it when it's fiction, but no problem when it's a memoir b/c it's said to be true you know?

Stephanie: I think people like Johnnu often start out one way and then their real personality comes out. It is a shame that he isn't a good guy, but I mean, it happens.

I agree that I don't think the town wanted to really search the murder and felt it was easier to say it was a suicide.

Again, I agree about what you were saying on Regan and Emilys' conversation. They really never did have heart-to-hearts' or talked things out like best friends often do and it was kind of their first time doing that..

I like the first quote you mentioned. It's so true and I bet that's an amazing feeling for a musician.

Again, chapter by chapter:

6:
I would never have really guessed the thing between Eric and Louisa. I can really see why she wanted to get out of town. I'm really glad Michael was there to help Louisa- I really like him. He seems so sweet and nice, and...well, awesome. I really respect Michael for helping her. I really hate that Louisa went back. She should have stayed at home where Michael dropped her off at. If Eric hurt her once, she should have known that he would hurt her again.

It would be nice to see that Louisa and Cloette are doing better in Boston, though, I have a feeling that it won't considering that much of Louisa's plan hasn't worked out in the past.

I think it's great that Molly still tries to keep in touch. One day, I hope Emily will be able to see the letters- or maybe even write one to Louisa herself. I wonder why Louisa hasn't really written one to Michael and Emily...or at least sent her regards through Molly.

7:
I really like the article Johnny wrote for She Laughs- it was cute and really sweet. And the letter that he attached to it with the article for Emily was sweetly written too.

I can't decide if I like the idea of moving to Chicago or not. I really think that she should stay with her dad, but depending on what she wants to do with the band...yeah.

The story with her grandparents was so sweet! It was adorable to see that she was always rebellious. It would have been nice to see Louisa walk over the bridge, but yeah, I wouldn't think that it would happen. Also, the services were really sad. They made me cry a little.

8:
It's good to see that the band is going in a good direction and getting a deal and some radio play.

Okay, Regan's abortion made me really scared and upset. It really does show the lack of communication that she and Emily had. I mean, I definitely didn't see it coming, and Emily didn't either. Hopefully they will get their friendship back together.

I didn't see the part with Johnny coming either! I guess it's maybe like, she didn't see it coming, we didn't either because many guys do appear to be really sweet and all, and then they turn bad and abusive and all. Maybe like the dangers of people out there. It was nice to see Emily defend herself until the police came, and I'm glad she decided to take out a restraining order- he deserves it all. Hopefully he'll stay away, and Emily won't have trouble with scum like him again.

9:
I think she made a good choice in going back and not staying there.

Aw. Michael saying 'Louisa' when Emily walked in shows that he wants her back. And him supporting Emily is so great.

Emily leaving again made me sad. I was hoping she'd learn not to stray away from someone like her fther.

Louisa's letter was so sad. I really wish she would have sent it, though I understand why she didn't. I hope one day Emily will be able to see the letter.

It would be great for Emily to see her mother on the trip. I'm just really holding out on a reunion between them.

I really didn't get the drug trip ending. Why is that the divider between going on with her music and not? Why did it really have to get this bad? I really hope she gets everything together, and realizes that this is not the way that she should be living.

Response soonish...

Denise: I know! I thought that Michael and Louisa were childhood sweet hearts too. Hum...I think maybe the closeness thing means that she's seen how her father and grandparents were hurt when someone so close to them left, so I think she doesn't want to get too close in fear of hurting them like Louisa did. (I guess that kind of makes sense, but it's worded so wrong, sorry.)

I think Johnny's sudden turn was supposed to be sudden because it kind of happens like that sometimes. Sometimes people don't show signs of things, and -boom- they do something strange/ unpredictable/ ect.

Stephanie: Oh, I like your quotes!

"I guess I can see the botched abortion as a way of demonstrating how out of touch Emily had become with Regan. But that could have been accomplished by having her od on pills and booze too. I thought the author was more trying to show that regan DID follow in her mother's footsteps and got pregnant as a teen. But regan didn't want to repeat history so she tried to abort. Because regan had mentioned it earlier, not wanting to repeat her mother's mistake."

-I agree...

And yeah...that's really it for now.